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#21
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She sends a joke. Usually it is something old and tired. Only rarely
is it something I haven't seen before or think is funny. Either way, there's never a personal note. I have joke books if I want jokes. I send a note telling some friendly news I think might be of interest and saying that I don't care for jokes much. The jokes continue. I ask questions of a friendly nature, try to start a conversation. No personal answers. I hint a little more and finally come out and say not to send me jokes. That's when the inspirational messages, the political petitions and urban legends begin. That is the truth if I ever heard it Julia! lol You've got down to a "T" and in just the right order. Shelly |
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#22
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nzl* wrote:
if i think of anything else that might be useful, i'll let ya know. gawd, i nearly went mad the week i got it. oh wait, i was mad already, ok, just got worse, swore a whole lot more. BTW, everyone, we use a Linux system.... -- Melinda http://cust.idl.com.au/athol |
#23
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Once knew a union rep who had to represent a woman who dropped her purse
on the workroom floor. (Chicago Post Office). When the purse hit the floor her gun went off, the supervisor peed his pants, somebody hit the fire alarm, and the fire fighter and cops came running! She was fired and sued to get her job back and that is where my friend came into the story. Her defense was that "everybody has a gun" He said that what really made her mad was that when the gun went off, her purse caught on fire "and that was my favorite purse!" Eventually they did get her reinstated but she went out on a disability claiming that she had hurt her back when she fell off her rest bar when the gun went off, Sometimes I miss the post office. |
#24
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Julia Altshuler wrote: I make a game of it. I give myself a point for each spam message I delete without reading and subtract a point for each one I miss and open before realizing it is spam. Some are easy. If the subject line reads "perspective Carribean elegy doughnut," and I've never heard of the sender, I know to delete that right away. Likewise for "VI*agr!a" and "$$$loseweight now." Some are harder. I might be tempted to open something that says "blast from the past" sent by a name that looks familiar. It could be spam, but it could be some old friend I haven't heard from in 20 years wondering if I'm the person she remembers. So I open it and give myself a dope slap if it there's an offer to enlarge my penis inside. I total up at the end of the day. I always win. I get 15-30 spam messages a day and only open one every now and then. --Lia Hehehe! I always think that if I used all those penis enlargement offers, it would be the size of the tower of Big Ben by now, and I'd need all the Viagra to keep it up! On the other hand, I'd have serious difficulty reaching the sewing machine round it! And being female, I'm not sure I need a thing that big... -- Kate XXXXXX Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons http://www.diceyhome.free-online.co.uk Click on Kate's Pages and explore! |
#25
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Julia, you have such a facility with the written word that you forget how
hard it is for many people to write. And actually to sort out and identify their feelings enough to find words for them-well, they might be among the large number who really don't want to dig too deeply into their murky subconscious. Much easier to be superficial. Before email, we had confirmation that our various relations and acquaintances were still alive when they sent the annual holiday card. Now, with the click of a button, they can "card" half the known universe in one go, for almost no money! What relationship do you really want with these people? Is their news of any real interest? Would they pay attention if you told them you didn't want jokes, etc., but only family news, before you gave them your address? Roberta in D " wrote in message news:Qw%6c.47561$J05.369148@attbi_s01... And this leads to an etiquette question I don't have a satisfactory answer to. I run into an old friend, someone I haven't seen in ages. Or maybe it is a new friend. We exchange email addresses. I look forward to coresponding a little news. She sends a joke. Usually it is something old and tired. Only rarely is it something I haven't seen before or think is funny. Either way, there's never a personal note. I have joke books if I want jokes. I send a note telling some friendly news I think might be of interest and saying that I don't care for jokes much. The jokes continue. I ask questions of a friendly nature, try to start a conversation. No personal answers. I hint a little more and finally come out and say not to send me jokes. That's when the inspirational messages, the political petitions and urban legends begin. Months can go by of being on this person's mailing list, and all I get amounts to spam. Still, I'm reluctant to delete without reading when I see the message line is from someone I know. I'm afraid of deleting it the one time she sends something written especially for me. Finally our old ISP gets bought out by a bigger company, and I get a new email address as a result. I don't bother to update the friend with the new address so I'm off the mailing list that way. Either that, or I say bluntly that I don't want mail unless it is a personal note. Then I never hear from them again. Is there any way to predict who will write to me and who will put me on a mailing list BEFORE I give out my address? Is there any effective way to let someone know not to send junk? Can you squeeze personal message water out of these otherwise friendly rocks? What does Miss Manners have to say? --Lia |
#26
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Roberta Zollner wrote:
Julia, you have such a facility with the written word that you forget how hard it is for many people to write. And actually to sort out and identify their feelings enough to find words for them-well, they might be among the large number who really don't want to dig too deeply into their murky subconscious. Much easier to be superficial. Before email, we had confirmation that our various relations and acquaintances were still alive when they sent the annual holiday card. Now, with the click of a button, they can "card" half the known universe in one go, for almost no money! What relationship do you really want with these people? Is their news of any real interest? Would they pay attention if you told them you didn't want jokes, etc., but only family news, before you gave them your address? You ask some good questions. My biggest disappointment with the personal mailing list phenomena comes from people I adore talking to in person, people I'd like to know better and think I have a personal relationship with. Then the moment the communication turns to email, I find that they don't have any interest in talking to me, only to broadcasting. I wouldn't mind superficial notes that don't deal with the subconsious, prefer them when I think about it. A note that said "My boss is driving me nuts. Benjamin's voice is changing. Rebecca is playing fiddle in the school concert. David's out of town at another conference. We had to get a new transmission on the old Toyota" would be fine. That gives me some idea of what's going on. I'd also like acknowledgement that my messages were received and read: "That's a shame about your neighbor's dog. I know what you mean about the time warp that surrounds computers. I got a good laugh about the Lindbergh gossip too. Who would have thought?" That they're just not good at writing is one possibility though I know that's not the case with my brother. It could be it with some others. Ideally I'd like the give and take of friendship, the way one person talks and the other listens, and then they trade places. Not every topic will be of interest. I might bring up Toyota repair and find that my friend has nothing to say on the subject, but that she has loads of memories and thoughts about neighborhood etiquette as regards dogs. I don't know if telling someone what sort of mail I want when I give out the address would work. I suppose I could try it. I've been reluctant to because there are people who write notes exactly the sort I want, old and new friends I correspond with quite happily and with no complaints. I wouldn't want to assume they'll put me on a mailing list without first giving them a chance to prove otherwise. --Lia |
#27
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but think of the people you'll impress with it!
Then again, I divorced one once.... "kate" wrote in message ... Julia Altshuler wrote: I make a game of it. I give myself a point for each spam message I delete without reading and subtract a point for each one I miss and open before realizing it is spam. Some are easy. If the subject line reads "perspective Carribean elegy doughnut," and I've never heard of the sender, I know to delete that right away. Likewise for "VI*agr!a" and "$$$loseweight now." Some are harder. I might be tempted to open something that says "blast from the past" sent by a name that looks familiar. It could be spam, but it could be some old friend I haven't heard from in 20 years wondering if I'm the person she remembers. So I open it and give myself a dope slap if it there's an offer to enlarge my penis inside. I total up at the end of the day. I always win. I get 15-30 spam messages a day and only open one every now and then. --Lia Hehehe! I always think that if I used all those penis enlargement offers, it would be the size of the tower of Big Ben by now, and I'd need all the Viagra to keep it up! On the other hand, I'd have serious difficulty reaching the sewing machine round it! And being female, I'm not sure I need a thing that big... -- Kate XXXXXX Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons http://www.diceyhome.free-online.co.uk Click on Kate's Pages and explore! |
#28
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How about just plain looking at the person with sadness and reluctance
saying, I hesitate giving out my address anymore. It seems so many people just want to send me stale jokes and old storys, and no one wants to just talk. That way the new emailer on your list knows youre not interested in that stuff. You could do what I did. My niece, a young woman of above average intelligence, started sending me all sorts of silly pass around emails and I put up with it for a while, family, you know, until the day she sent me a petition to stop the horrendous practice of bonsia kittys, where they ostensibly grow kittens inside of glass bottles. I politely asked her to use her common sensometer before sending me any more of this type email. Hmm... I havent heard from her since. Do you think I offended her? Diana ;-) -- Queen of FAQs Royal Peace Maker http://photos.yahoo.com/lunamom44 "Julia Altshuler" wrote in message news:y_h7c.53843$_w.852505@attbi_s53... I don't know if telling someone what sort of mail I want when I give out the address would work. I suppose I could try it. I've been reluctant to because there are people who write notes exactly the sort I want, old and new friends I correspond with quite happily and with no complaints. I wouldn't want to assume they'll put me on a mailing list without first giving them a chance to prove otherwise. --Lia |
#29
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Diana Curtis wrote:
How about just plain looking at the person with sadness and reluctance saying, I hesitate giving out my address anymore. It seems so many people just want to send me stale jokes and old storys, and no one wants to just talk. That way the new emailer on your list knows youre not interested in that stuff. I think I will try opening the conversation to what sorts of messages I'd like to receive at the time of giving out my address. My favorite story on this subject involves the urban legend of the missing 10 year old girl. I used to be on the mailing list of a local quilt shop owner. I liked getting news about classes and shows. One day I got a forwarded message about a missing girl. There was a picture of her. There was a phone number to call if I'd seen her, news about how she'd been gone for 2 weeks, all the sort of detail you'd expect. I was supposed to get the word out. It said something about how it would only take a minute to send it to everyone I knew. I hadn't heard a thing about it on the news. I typed a few key words into google and got tons of hits telling me that none of it was true. The phone number was disconnected. Law enforcement had never heard of her. The picture could have been anyone. No one knew the names mentioned in the message. They went on to point out the obvious: Wasting people's time with girls who AREN'T missing takes resources away from finding children who ARE. This one seemed more harmful than your usual stale joke or urban legend. I wrote a quick message pointing out that it took me only a minute to check the veracity of that story and that she might have done the same. I gave web pages and the message about not wasting resources. It was in my usual abrupt style. I don't call names, but I don't waste words either. I would have thought she'd tell me she was glad I'd let her know or maybe even apologize for her mistake, but I never heard a word. She did take me off her mailing list. I haven't gotten a thing from her since, no class or show information either. As with your niece, do you think I offended her? Do you think we should care? --Lia |
#30
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My God Diana, haven't you heard? Where do you live, woman?? Those are
the amazing stem-cell cloned kitties - kind of like the sea monkeys, remember? You put the kitty seed in the bottle with a little bit of sterile water and sugar (comes in the kit), and in 60 days you have this wonderful kitten.. and you get to watch all the embrionic development, that is a plus I bet her email didn't mention! The only problem is when they get too big and start pressing against the glass and end up shaped like the inside of the bottle.. at that point most nice people try to break the bottle without harming them but it is hard, you know?!!! Diana Curtis wrote: How about just plain looking at the person with sadness and reluctance saying, I hesitate giving out my address anymore. It seems so many people just want to send me stale jokes and old storys, and no one wants to just talk. That way the new emailer on your list knows youre not interested in that stuff. You could do what I did. My niece, a young woman of above average intelligence, started sending me all sorts of silly pass around emails and I put up with it for a while, family, you know, until the day she sent me a petition to stop the horrendous practice of bonsia kittys, where they ostensibly grow kittens inside of glass bottles. I politely asked her to use her common sensometer before sending me any more of this type email. Hmm... I havent heard from her since. Do you think I offended her? Diana ;-) -- Queen of FAQs Royal Peace Maker http://photos.yahoo.com/lunamom44 "Julia Altshuler" wrote in message news:y_h7c.53843$_w.852505@attbi_s53... I don't know if telling someone what sort of mail I want when I give out the address would work. I suppose I could try it. I've been reluctant to because there are people who write notes exactly the sort I want, old and new friends I correspond with quite happily and with no complaints. I wouldn't want to assume they'll put me on a mailing list without first giving them a chance to prove otherwise. --Lia -- Dr. Quilter Ambassador of Extraordinary Aliens http://community.webshots.com/user/mvignali (take the dog out before replying) |
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