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#1
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Dear Red States
Dear Red States:
We've decided we're simultaneously leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, California, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, New York, and all of the Northeastern states. After this election, we'll be adding Colorado and New Mexico. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, especially to the people of our new country - Nuevo California. To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states; we get stem cell research, the best beaches, and the best ski resorts. We get the Statue of Liberty; you get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft; you get WorldCom. We get Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Cal Tech, MIT and Columbia; you get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs; you get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share. Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than that of the Christian Coalition, we get a bunch of happy families and you get a bunch of under-educated single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we'll need all of our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They apparently have kids they're willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't mind if you don't televise their kid's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq and hope that those Weapons of Mass Destruction turn up for you, but we're not willing to spend any more of our money in Bush's Quagmire. With the Blue States, we will control 80 percent of the country's fresh water,90 percent of pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 97percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at your state dinners), 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, and all the Ivy League and Seven Sister schools. We also get New England, the Great Lakes and Yosemite, thank you very much. In the Red States, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans and their projected health care costs, 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, 100 percent of tornadoes, 94 percent of hurricanes, 99 percent of Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, and Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bob Jones University, and Clemson. Additionally, in the Red States, 38 percent actually believe Jonah was swallowed by a whale; 62 percent believe life is sacred unless it involves the death penalty or gun ownership; 44 percent claim that evolution is only a theory; 53 percent insist that Saddam Hussein was involved in 9/11; and 61 percent of you crazy *******s believe you have higher moral standards than those of us on the left. By the way, we're taking all the good pot, too. You get that dirt weed from Mexico and Kansas ditches. Peace out, The Blue States -- Karen C - California Editor/Proofreader www.IntlProofingConsortium.com Finished 10/7/08 - Sun Fun (Dimensions) WIP: Nativity from "Countdown to Christmas" book, Oriental Kimono (Janlynn), MLI The Teacher (gift to the library), Bethany Angel (Marbek) Retrieved from UFO pile: Marbek's Snow Angel, MLI Farmers Market CFSfacts -- where we give you the facts and dispel the myths Myths, with research cites: http://www.aacfs.org/images/pdfs/myths.pdf Newest research blog: http://cfs-facts.blogspot.com/ |
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#2
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Dear Red States
"Karen C in California" wrote in message ... Dear Red States: We've decided we're simultaneously leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, California, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, New York, and all of the Northeastern states. After this election, we'll be adding Colorado and New Mexico. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, especially to the people of our new country - Nuevo California. To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states; we get stem cell research, the best beaches, and the best ski resorts. We get the Statue of Liberty; you get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft; you get WorldCom. We get Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Cal Tech, MIT and Columbia; you get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs; you get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share. Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than that of the Christian Coalition, we get a bunch of happy families and you get a bunch of under-educated single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we'll need all of our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They apparently have kids they're willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't mind if you don't televise their kid's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq and hope that those Weapons of Mass Destruction turn up for you, but we're not willing to spend any more of our money in Bush's Quagmire. With the Blue States, we will control 80 percent of the country's fresh water,90 percent of pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 97percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at your state dinners), 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, and all the Ivy League and Seven Sister schools. We also get New England, the Great Lakes and Yosemite, thank you very much. In the Red States, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans and their projected health care costs, 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, 100 percent of tornadoes, 94 percent of hurricanes, 99 percent of Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, and Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bob Jones University, and Clemson. Additionally, in the Red States, 38 percent actually believe Jonah was swallowed by a whale; 62 percent believe life is sacred unless it involves the death penalty or gun ownership; 44 percent claim that evolution is only a theory; 53 percent insist that Saddam Hussein was involved in 9/11; and 61 percent of you crazy *******s believe you have higher moral standards than those of us on the left. By the way, we're taking all the good pot, too. You get that dirt weed from Mexico and Kansas ditches. Peace out, The Blue States -- Karen C - California Offensive as HELL, especially the paragraph about happy families vs. "under-educated single moms" as if they are mutually exclusive. If espousing spew like this comes with blue state residency, then I'm moving. Count me out of your "new country". Jinx |
#3
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Dear Red States
"Jinx Minx" wrote in message ... "Karen C in California" wrote in message ... Dear Red States: We've decided we're simultaneously leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, California, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, New York, and all of the Northeastern states. After this election, we'll be adding Colorado and New Mexico. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, especially to the people of our new country - Nuevo California. To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states; we get stem cell research, the best beaches, and the best ski resorts. We get the Statue of Liberty; you get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft; you get WorldCom. We get Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Cal Tech, MIT and Columbia; you get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs; you get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share. Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than that of the Christian Coalition, we get a bunch of happy families and you get a bunch of under-educated single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we'll need all of our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They apparently have kids they're willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't mind if you don't televise their kid's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq and hope that those Weapons of Mass Destruction turn up for you, but we're not willing to spend any more of our money in Bush's Quagmire. With the Blue States, we will control 80 percent of the country's fresh water,90 percent of pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 97percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at your state dinners), 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, and all the Ivy League and Seven Sister schools. We also get New England, the Great Lakes and Yosemite, thank you very much. In the Red States, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans and their projected health care costs, 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, 100 percent of tornadoes, 94 percent of hurricanes, 99 percent of Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, and Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bob Jones University, and Clemson. Additionally, in the Red States, 38 percent actually believe Jonah was swallowed by a whale; 62 percent believe life is sacred unless it involves the death penalty or gun ownership; 44 percent claim that evolution is only a theory; 53 percent insist that Saddam Hussein was involved in 9/11; and 61 percent of you crazy *******s believe you have higher moral standards than those of us on the left. By the way, we're taking all the good pot, too. You get that dirt weed from Mexico and Kansas ditches. Peace out, The Blue States -- Karen C - California Offensive as HELL, especially the paragraph about happy families vs. "under-educated single moms" as if they are mutually exclusive. If espousing spew like this comes with blue state residency, then I'm moving. Count me out of your "new country". Jinx I don`t think that Karen`s really qualified to make judgements on Happy Families, either, do you? Pat |
#4
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Dear Red States
So - if the "red states" and their residents don't have freedom of speech or
religion anymore? C |
#5
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Dear Red States
In article , Karen C in California
wrote: Dear Red States: We've decided we're simultaneously leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, California, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, New York, and all of the Northeastern states. After this election, we'll be adding Colorado and New Mexico. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, especially to the people of our new country - Nuevo California. Why in the world would you name it after California? Isn't that a tad bit arrogant? I'll bet the other Blue states won't care much for it. Why don't you just cut to the chase and proclaim it "Karen's Kountry?" To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states; we get stem cell research, the best beaches, and the best ski resorts. We get the Statue of Liberty; you get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft; you get WorldCom. We get Stanford, Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Cal Tech, MIT and Columbia; you get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs; you get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share. Sooo .... no oil whatsoever for the Blue States???? I hope you have enough cash to invest in all solar heating -- with an average yearly temp in the 60s, the nights'll get a tad chilly. Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than that of the Christian Coalition, we get a bunch of happy families and you get a bunch of under-educated single moms. The counties in my state (Florida) that voted predominantly Democratic have the lowest median incomes and the lowest number of college-degree-holders. Also, on average, they also have the highest numbers for living below the poverty line. So, basically, you're saying that the very people who voted Democratic will be left out in the cold? Also, aren't those the people that Democrats have been so dedicated to help??????? I thought Dems were famous (and laudably so) for their welfare programs, healthcare initiatives, etc. I was also under the (apparently foolish) assumption that Dems were champions of ANTI-discrimination??? When did judging someone by the amount of money they make or the amount of higher education they can afford become "Democratic???" Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we'll need all of our citizens back from Iraq at once. I'm not touching that one. Since we've not had a draft since '73, the people that are currently serving in Iraq are "volunteers" -- they've either enlisted in Active Duty or in the Reserves. Both situations are voluntary (though being deployed is obviously not). The possibility of being deployed during war-time is disclosed to potential service-members at the moment of signing on the dotted line. So what I'm wondering is this: Do you believe that the US Military sneaked into homes in the middle of the night and conscripted these people? Do you believe that their names were forged on the enlistment documents? The bottom line is that even if they only joined for the extra $$ or for the GI Bill (which would be silly considering how hard it is to actually USE in many cases), they VOLUNTEERED knowing full well that so many countries despise us that we WILL get into one fracas or another. With the Blue States, we will control 80 percent of the country's fresh water,90 percent of pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 97percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at your state dinners), 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, and all the Ivy League and Seven Sister schools. We also get New England, the Great Lakes and Yosemite, thank you very much. You also get the highest crime rates. Congrats. Be sure to mention the niceties you cite above to the next serial murderer or armed robber you meet. In the Red States, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans and their projected health care costs, 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, 100 percent of tornadoes, 94 percent of hurricanes, 99 percent of Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, and Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bob Jones University, and Clemson. You go ahead and enjoy those earthquakes! And the smog. Don't forget the smog. Additionally, in the Red States, 38 percent actually believe Jonah was swallowed by a whale; 62 percent believe life is sacred unless it involves the death penalty or gun ownership; 44 percent claim that evolution is only a theory; 53 percent insist that Saddam Hussein was involved in 9/11; and 61 percent of you crazy *******s believe you have higher moral standards than those of us on the left. Apparently, if you're an example, they may not be more "morally upright" than you, but according to your statements about "under-educated single moms" (most of which, I'll bet, of which are minorities -- since they typically don't have the resources for higher education -- raising a child alone does cost substantial funds), they can at least say that they're not as discriminatory as you are. By the way, we're taking all the good pot, too. You get that dirt weed from Mexico and Kansas ditches. Apparently the good cocaine, too! Peace out, The Blue States If your discriminatory spews are any indicator (and I think they are), you're about as "Blue" as Bush!!! Try walking the talk, not just blabbering on about it. I hope against all hope that your post was a failed attempt at humor. If not, don't be surprised if our party disowns you. I think even Obama would be horribly ashamed at your post. Horribly. -- dark.angel |
#6
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Dear Red States
Pat P wrote:
"Jinx Minx" wrote in message ... "Karen C in California" wrote in message ... Dear Red States: snipped Offensive as HELL, especially the paragraph about happy families vs. "under-educated single moms" as if they are mutually exclusive. If espousing spew like this comes with blue state residency, then I'm moving. Count me out of your "new country". Jinx I don`t think that Karen`s really qualified to make judgements on Happy Families, either, do you? Pat Karen didn't write the piece she posted; it's satire/humour that's been circulating the Web since the 2004 Presidential election. |
#7
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Dear Red States
Karen didn't write the piece she posted; it's satire/humour that's been circulating the Web since the 2004 Presidential election. I don't care - I still find it extremely offensive. Linda |
#8
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Dear Red States
dark.angel wrote:
In article , Karen C in California wrote: Dear Red States: snipped Peace out, The Blue States If your discriminatory spews are any indicator (and I think they are), you're about as "Blue" as Bush!!! Try walking the talk, not just blabbering on about it. I hope against all hope that your post was a failed attempt at humor. If not, don't be surprised if our party disowns you. I think even Obama would be horribly ashamed at your post. Horribly. Karen didn't write the piece; it's been circulating the Web since the 2004 Presidential election. |
#9
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Dear Red States
"flitterbit" wrote in message ... dark.angel wrote: In article , Karen C in California wrote: Dear Red States: snipped Peace out, The Blue States If your discriminatory spews are any indicator (and I think they are), you're about as "Blue" as Bush!!! Try walking the talk, not just blabbering on about it. I hope against all hope that your post was a failed attempt at humor. If not, don't be surprised if our party disowns you. I think even Obama would be horribly ashamed at your post. Horribly. Karen didn't write the piece; it's been circulating the Web since the 2004 Presidential election. I am a looooong time lurker (mostly) and usually like Karen's posts....however, she has just been added to my kiillfile. That was the most offensive post I have read to date on the group. Even the trolls posts I know are just drivel......I had respected Karen's comments before this.......whether they are actually her's or not she posted it. Julie in Hondo |
#10
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Dear Red States
In article
, wrote: On Nov 6, 11:12 am, "Julie K. Eitze" wrote: That was the most offensive post I have read to date on the group. Even the trolls posts I know are just drivel......I had respected Karen's comments before this.......whether they are actually her's or not she posted it. I have to side with you on this. NOTHING indicated to me that it was old, or was comprised of someone else's words. I never read it before and I bet a lot of us never did either. I have learned that it is very difficult to convey satire, humor, sarcasm etc. with he written word, - yay, even the spoken word - heck, look at Palin and the Russia-across-the-strait comments. Ya gotta just tell it with sincerity or risk being misinterpreted. Red state, blue state - who cares - I'm just glad to be an "Uh - merikin" and I wish our country well. Uh-MEN!!!! -- dark.angel |
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