I was in a somewhat similar circumstance when I was 13. Kids just need
to know they didn't cause the problem and it isn't their job to fix it.
Kids aren't the reason for a divorce and it isn't their job to make
parents happy.

It is Billy's job to be Billy and tell all the adults exactly how he
feels, what he thinks, and what is his wish in the matter. If he
doesn't know how he feels, it's his job to tell the adults that too.
That is all he is equipped to handle at his age. He can't make mom well
(although I know that is tearing him apart) and he can't make dad happy.
He doesn't need to be strong, that's the adults' jobs, not his.

I'm praying that, whomever else he has to talk to, he will be told he
wasn't put here on earth to fix his parents problems. Billy is a
wonderful kid with a really, really great mom.

Please tell Billy for me that it was hard, but I got through it, and he
will too. He has lots of "aunts" out here who truly care what happens
to him.

Tina wrote:

Being the very appreciative recipient of a huge bundle of love and
prayers this week, I feel almost ashamed to ask for prayers today - but
I absolutely have to. Not for myself though, for Billy.

It's a long, years old story - but it appears that we are headed back
to court again. Since my daughter left home and I am headed to NIH to
try and get a handle on my health issues - my ex has decided that this
all means that I am not a fit mother (again) and that my son should be
taken away from me and go to live with this alcoholic and abusive man
and his family.

This is just tearing Billy to pieces! His dad apparently worked on him
heavily this past Saturday, trying to convince him that he "wants" to
go live with his dad. It creates intense feelings of guilt, insecurity
and fear for the poor child because he doesn't want to leave his mom,
he doesn't want to hurt his dad...... it's a long story and far too
much to expect a child to deal with.

He is still in therapy and had an extremely rough session with her on
Wednesday. Yesterday we went to his psychiatrist and she has now
diagnosed him with Severe Depressive Disorder. (He asked me on Sunday
if I knew how long it takes somebody to die if they stab themself.
When I asked him why he would ask such a question, he told me it was
because he wants to die. He doesn't want to go through this any more!)

It is really heartbreaking and unfortunately, there isn't anything I
can do to stop the situation at the moment except to prepare to go
through the court battle again and try to put a permanent stop to it
this time.

The most important and valuable thing (I feel) that I can do for him at
this moment - is to pray. Whatever form that takes for you, I'd
appreciate it immensely on Billy's behalf. A good thought, a pagan
blessing, a Goddesses wish, whatever - Billy and I just need all the
faith and hope we can get at the moment and we'll take it in any way we
can get it!

Thank you again with all my heart for your Hugs and prayers already,
and thank you even more so, for Billy
Tina